If you run, ensure you’re running towards something, never away.
I Kept Running From Myself, I Just Discovered I Wasn’t
There’s a time I kept running, and running, and running some more
I ran in the woods—my favorite running spot,
I ran by the road, in the field, in marathons,
And I ran in my head
Running in my head was more,
There’s something about wanting out so badly,
And going to the woods to run helped.
It metaphorically helped feel like running away,
Away from that which I was trying to escape.
But the thing is, You don’t outrun yourself.
It feels good, liberating, clears your head,
And it makes you run nonstop until your feet bleed, forcing you to stop.
But in the end, there you still are!
But recently, I stopped to ask:
Was I running to or from something?
It felt like I was running from something, sometimes from myself.
But it turns out,
I was actually running to something.
Feeling calmer, still, peaceful, and happy despite the turmoil feels like I’ve arrived somewhere.
See, the things I was running from are still there, still glaring at me.
Plus, I’m still there; as sometimes I felt like I was running from myself
But now I understand why the running felt fruitless; I was running from rather than to. So, of course, it was frustrating as the things I was running from would never disappear. They’d actually chase after me.
And when I finally stumbled upon that which I needed,
I’ve not stopped running, only that I’m running with a different mindset.
It’s more of running toward something,
Toward whatever I need to make the existing voices in my head quiet.
Toward an emotionally intelligent self,
Peace and serenity,
Toward a quiet sanctuary into which I can disappear and feel at peace and quiet in my own company while still in a crowd,
Or feel like I’m in the presence of a divine power while still among people.
Luckily, whatever I was running to kept calling on me.
It turns out the soul’s desires are stronger than anything else, and it will keep pushing you until you see what you need and not want.
Fruitless as the running felt, the universe’s arms were always stretched out, waiting to embrace me.
It only had to take the realization that,
I’m running toward something and not from—albeit taking too long
Only when you know where you’re headed, what you’re seeking, running towards, do you have a purpose.
Only then do you feel like you don’t need to run endlessly,
Only then do you stop feeling like your running is headed nowhere, is frustrating, and unfathomable to you.
Only then do you give your running purpose.
The words of Kristin Armstrong, the most decorated US women’s cyclist, put all the sense into this experience; she says,
“There is something magical about running; after a certain distance, it transcends the body. Then a bit further, it transcends the mind. A bit further yet, and what you have before you, laid bare, is the soul.”
As you run, ask yourself,
Are you running from or to something?
Don’t wait too long, as you might end up running into the trenches. Take a deeper look into your soul, and you’ll find the answer.
Here’s to meaningful running!
Here’s to discovering the ‘why,’ and to running into that which is aligned with our heart’s desires, sometimes even unknown to the runner.